Knees to CHEST!

Because it’s Friday, and I’m in the mood for something different, I’d like to talk about one of my biggest pet peeves.

Let me introduce you to….

The Slow Walker.

I seriously want to shove people who walk at the speed of a snail.  Does that mean I have anger problems?!

I don’t consider myself an extremely fast walker.  Definitely faster than most, but cannot stand people who just move so freaking slowly to their non-pressing engagements while I clearly am RIGHT behind them.  Don’t they sense me walking up their ass?  Wouldn’t they think to step ASIDE since I’m pretty much breathing fiery rage down their necks?!

I would say this happens to me at least once a day when I’m in the office.  Usually when I’m on the way down to the kitchen / café on the second floor from where I sit on the third floor.  Usually on the way back, when my stomach is rumbling and I’m now HANGRY because all I want to do is eat my lunch, but I CAN’T because I’m stuck behind the Guinness book’s slowest person in the world having a conversation about God knows what.  Sorry co-workers, but you’ve GOT to pick up the pace.  It does help to move a little…

Don’t even get me started on the mall.  Or the grocery store.  Or the airport.  Don’t these people get my mental vibes that I’m considering injury by shopping bag and/or shopping cart and/or suitcase if they don’t hurry up or get out of the way!?

I also hate slow walkers that I mistakenly let cross the street while I’m driving.

I should not have to sit at a mock 10 minute red light while Slow McGee meanders across the road like they have all the time in the world!  #instantregret.

What will it take to get these people moving?  Should I yell “FIYAHH” at them next time?  I seriously just don’t get it.

Anyone else share in my sidewalk rage?!

I’ll be back later on with some more randomness.  Happy Friday!

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7 thoughts on “Knees to CHEST!

  1. My parents are usually the culprits…driving/ walking, you name it. I also hate when people become loud breathers when they eat. I don’t need to hear their flaring nostril problem while I am trying to enjoy dinner thankyouverymuch

  2. I agree with all of the above. I also hate it when people at the grocery store take up the entire aisle with their cart and are oblivious to it! C’mon people!

  3. I GET YOU!!!! YES!!!!!!!!!!!! When I worked in Manhattan I became the world’s fastest rush hour “bob-and-weaver” through crowded Penn Station. Being New Yorkers, we all seemed to be on the same fast-paced track. But, when I would have to walk through dreaded Times Square to get to my office, it got ugly fast! Seriously family of 15, staring up at the sky, you all need to walk in a Red Rover line, HOLDING HANDS, taking up the entire width of the sidewalk?!?! Yes, they’re called skyscrapers, NOW MOVE IT ALONG!!!
    I can’t tell you how many barricades I rudely shoved my way through over the years. Your sidewalk rage is indeed a shared emotion, and I thank you it!!! Happy Friday!

  4. Reading this makes me feel better that I am not the only one. Aisles/walkways are not made for standing and chatting. Move over and let us through! Definitely feel your pain.

  5. I have found people looking back at me in “fear” because they heard me coming up on them so fast! If they move out of the way, then it’s fine by me.

  6. I read your post while I was away and just had to comment on this. I SHARE YOUR RAGE! I have plowed through so many people it is too numerous to count. I have perfected the perfect run/weave to get around those slow browsers at the mall who have no clue on how to even move. How about when they peek over their shoulders and just move in to block you any way? But the worst-the slow driver approaching a yellow light, almost stops then bombs through the intersection leaving you at the red light. Thanks for sharing, Athena, I feel better just venting!

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